Let me in

I blamed you for not letting me in but the truth is I wasn’t letting you in either at least not fully not completely.

I complained about how you had one foot in one foot out when I was also the same way. I was also holding the door open and closing it at the same time.

Holding on and letting go. I said you never wanted to stay when I was constantly the one running. Pulling you in and then pushing you away. I didn’t know it at the time I was so focused on making you the villain that I couldn’t see you were the mirror.

Despite how much I said I loved you, I wasn’t being honest with myself. I wanted you to open up to me but I was completely closed off.

I wanted you to stop seeing other people while I was still stuck in old patterns. Still escaping, still running. Still afraid of love and for that I apologize. I also needed to heal too it shouldn’t have been all on you.